News
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world's only daily column wiping the dust off the television.
It's been a long and fruitful summer, and there've been many outdoor frolics, campouts, journeys and river dips.
But alas the season of Earth's greatest sport is nearly within spitting distance.
A man once said “There are only three sports: bullfighting, motor racing and mountaineering; all the rest area merely games.”
That man was Ernest Hemingway.
OK, so it's a game.
But regardless of your definition, American football is much better on TV than any alternative.
It's essentially a battle among communities and colleges — but not community colleges — to determine which is best.
So that's great.
***
In other news, we recently found ourselves dancing like fools to the music of Houses, a Denver band that opened for the Fruit Bats at Three20South in Breckenridge last week.
It's great to have Colorado bands out there that don't mimic Widespread Panic or Yonder Mountain String Band or whatever hippie-electronica music the dopers are dancing to.
The band we enjoyed Thursday night played original folk rock tracks that brought smiles
to the faces of the 25 or so people who made it out that night.
Any state with a John Denver's song attached to its identity ought to have some kind of folk-ish sounding music scene.
We welcome the diversity.
***
And while football season lies within two moon phases of present day, we're also anticipating the approach of that chilly white stuff in a few weeks.
If memory serves correctly, the first snow of the 2009-10 season came the first week in September.
Get ready for longer nights and more time spent indoors.
There's no better way to keep the blood warm than with some top-shelf action films.
For any noobs out there, here's a guide:
1. “RoboCop” — Filmed in Dallas in 1987, this one stands
out as the best for its über-sinister bad guys (including Kurtwood Smith from ‘That 70's Show'), freakishly gory deaths (man falls in toxic chemicals before stumbling in front of a car, exploding into goo on impact) and high-ranking cheeseball acting:
“Reporter: Robo, excuse me, Robo, any special message for
all the kids watching at home?
RoboCop: Stay out of trouble.”
Awesome.
2. “Navy SEALs” — They're always on call to go kick some ass. Stuff blows up, terrorists
get shot, Charlie Sheen goes
overboard (pun intended). And the golfing sequence is absolutely priceless.
3. “Surviving the Game” —
A ballsy take on the classic short story from 1924, this film tells even better the story of a lone man's triumph over evil wealthy power-mongers 70 years later.
Ice-T is a dreadlocked homeless guy on the verge of suicide until Gary Busey and Rutger Hauer give him a reason to live: killing bad guys. Bravo!
3. “Crank II: High Voltage”
— 21st-century king of badasses Jason Statham hits his stride
in the first “Crank,” in this one
he kills.
This one has it all: sex,
violence and bizarre characters.
You might just lose your breath watching this craftfully filmed rollercoaster ride.
4. “Shoot ‘Em Up” — You like gun fights? This is the ultimate. It's filmed like one long series
of battles where every caliber under the sun gets popped.
This one gets extra points for
the use of a baby (yes, an infant) in a surprisingly high number
of the violent scenes.
5. “Out For Justice” —
You want your kids to keep off drugs? Show them this Steven Seagal gem.
His one-liners are almost as slick as his punches while he kicks druggie ass with a vengeance. The bar scene with
a cueball is especially delightful.
6. “Predator” — Arnold Schwarzenegger runs through
the jungle yelling and shooting big guns.
7. “Red Dawn” — For every kid who ever stared out his high school classroom window fantasizing about communist paratroopers, this is purgatory.
8. “Con Air” — A bunch of
violent prisoners take over an
airplane. Yes!
9. “Crank” — A guy wakes
up to find out that if his pulse
gets below a certain level, he
dies. So he runs around keeping high on adrenaline and killing a lot of people. Yeah!
10. “Die Hard 2: Die Harder” — It's Christmas Eve again, so Bruce Willis gets into a jam where he has to kill, kill, KILL, even jamming an icicle in a bad guy's eye socket. Parts of this were filmed in Breckenridge, which offers some novelty to
an already charming flick.
***
These films are meant for kicks. Don't even bother looking up what Roger Ebert or those other dweebs have to say.
And don't send us hate mail for leaving out Tarantino films
or “The Matrix” or whatever other artsy-fartsy favorites you adore: Action movies are best served pure.
It's been a long and fruitful summer, and there've been many outdoor frolics, campouts, journeys and river dips.
But alas the season of Earth's greatest sport is nearly within spitting distance.
A man once said “There are only three sports: bullfighting, motor racing and mountaineering; all the rest area merely games.”
That man was Ernest Hemingway.
OK, so it's a game.
But regardless of your definition, American football is much better on TV than any alternative.
It's essentially a battle among communities and colleges — but not community colleges — to determine which is best.
So that's great.
***
In other news, we recently found ourselves dancing like fools to the music of Houses, a Denver band that opened for the Fruit Bats at Three20South in Breckenridge last week.
It's great to have Colorado bands out there that don't mimic Widespread Panic or Yonder Mountain String Band or whatever hippie-electronica music the dopers are dancing to.
The band we enjoyed Thursday night played original folk rock tracks that brought smiles
to the faces of the 25 or so people who made it out that night.
Any state with a John Denver's song attached to its identity ought to have some kind of folk-ish sounding music scene.
We welcome the diversity.
***
And while football season lies within two moon phases of present day, we're also anticipating the approach of that chilly white stuff in a few weeks.
If memory serves correctly, the first snow of the 2009-10 season came the first week in September.
Get ready for longer nights and more time spent indoors.
There's no better way to keep the blood warm than with some top-shelf action films.
For any noobs out there, here's a guide:
1. “RoboCop” — Filmed in Dallas in 1987, this one stands
out as the best for its über-sinister bad guys (including Kurtwood Smith from ‘That 70's Show'), freakishly gory deaths (man falls in toxic chemicals before stumbling in front of a car, exploding into goo on impact) and high-ranking cheeseball acting:
“Reporter: Robo, excuse me, Robo, any special message for
all the kids watching at home?
RoboCop: Stay out of trouble.”
Awesome.
2. “Navy SEALs” — They're always on call to go kick some ass. Stuff blows up, terrorists
get shot, Charlie Sheen goes
overboard (pun intended). And the golfing sequence is absolutely priceless.
3. “Surviving the Game” —
A ballsy take on the classic short story from 1924, this film tells even better the story of a lone man's triumph over evil wealthy power-mongers 70 years later.
Ice-T is a dreadlocked homeless guy on the verge of suicide until Gary Busey and Rutger Hauer give him a reason to live: killing bad guys. Bravo!
3. “Crank II: High Voltage”
— 21st-century king of badasses Jason Statham hits his stride
in the first “Crank,” in this one
he kills.
This one has it all: sex,
violence and bizarre characters.
You might just lose your breath watching this craftfully filmed rollercoaster ride.
4. “Shoot ‘Em Up” — You like gun fights? This is the ultimate. It's filmed like one long series
of battles where every caliber under the sun gets popped.
This one gets extra points for
the use of a baby (yes, an infant) in a surprisingly high number
of the violent scenes.
5. “Out For Justice” —
You want your kids to keep off drugs? Show them this Steven Seagal gem.
His one-liners are almost as slick as his punches while he kicks druggie ass with a vengeance. The bar scene with
a cueball is especially delightful.
6. “Predator” — Arnold Schwarzenegger runs through
the jungle yelling and shooting big guns.
7. “Red Dawn” — For every kid who ever stared out his high school classroom window fantasizing about communist paratroopers, this is purgatory.
8. “Con Air” — A bunch of
violent prisoners take over an
airplane. Yes!
9. “Crank” — A guy wakes
up to find out that if his pulse
gets below a certain level, he
dies. So he runs around keeping high on adrenaline and killing a lot of people. Yeah!
10. “Die Hard 2: Die Harder” — It's Christmas Eve again, so Bruce Willis gets into a jam where he has to kill, kill, KILL, even jamming an icicle in a bad guy's eye socket. Parts of this were filmed in Breckenridge, which offers some novelty to
an already charming flick.
***
These films are meant for kicks. Don't even bother looking up what Roger Ebert or those other dweebs have to say.
And don't send us hate mail for leaving out Tarantino films
or “The Matrix” or whatever other artsy-fartsy favorites you adore: Action movies are best served pure.
