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ENLARGE
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world's only daily column that must take issue with Woody's column next door about how you can't turn back the hands of time. Oh sure, Woody's got all kinds of book learnin' and fancy initials after his name, but surely there are ways to prolong youth? Why, just yesterday we saw an ad on TV (right after another ad from an ambulance-chasin' attorney) about some kind sklarge you rub on your face to whisk away wrinkles. And then there's the whole “get a creepy portrait of yourself to put in the attic and age while you stay forever young” approach, promoted by the likes of Oscar Wilde.
We also hear exercise can help you stay younger longer, and we're pretty sure all the nonagenerians and octogenerians out on the hill 100+ days a year around here are testament to that. It's also a good idea, we understand, to sleep in specially vulcanized rubber socks stuffed with overripe avocados. Yet another idea promulgated in Dr. Festus' Almanac of Youth is to whack your funny bone repeatedly with an enormous blood sausage whilst chanting the words to Barry Manilow's classic Mandy — translated into Swedish.
Just to help you along the ways, we've taken the trouble to translate the first part of the song for you:
Jag minns hela mitt liv
Regnar ner så kall som is
En skugga av en man
Ett ansikte genom ett fönster
Gråt i natt
Natten går in
Morgon, bara en dag
Lyckliga människor passerar min väg
Söker i deras ögon
Jag ser ett minne
Jag insåg aldrig
Hur glad du gjort mig, o Mandy
You're welcome. And thanks to Woody for contributing this cool science column once a month in the Daily. Typically we would put him on a more dignified page than this one, but we just had too much other stuff going on today.
And just to close the loop and not leave you hanging, here's the chorus to Mandy:
Tja du kom och du gav utan att ta
Och jag skickade iväg, oh Mandy
Och du kysste mig och stoppade mig från att skaka
Och jag behöver dig i dag, oh Mandy
Let us know if you feel any younger after belting this out in your shower.
We out.
We also hear exercise can help you stay younger longer, and we're pretty sure all the nonagenerians and octogenerians out on the hill 100+ days a year around here are testament to that. It's also a good idea, we understand, to sleep in specially vulcanized rubber socks stuffed with overripe avocados. Yet another idea promulgated in Dr. Festus' Almanac of Youth is to whack your funny bone repeatedly with an enormous blood sausage whilst chanting the words to Barry Manilow's classic Mandy — translated into Swedish.
Just to help you along the ways, we've taken the trouble to translate the first part of the song for you:
Jag minns hela mitt liv
Regnar ner så kall som is
En skugga av en man
Ett ansikte genom ett fönster
Gråt i natt
Natten går in
Morgon, bara en dag
Lyckliga människor passerar min väg
Söker i deras ögon
Jag ser ett minne
Jag insåg aldrig
Hur glad du gjort mig, o Mandy
You're welcome. And thanks to Woody for contributing this cool science column once a month in the Daily. Typically we would put him on a more dignified page than this one, but we just had too much other stuff going on today.
And just to close the loop and not leave you hanging, here's the chorus to Mandy:
Tja du kom och du gav utan att ta
Och jag skickade iväg, oh Mandy
Och du kysste mig och stoppade mig från att skaka
Och jag behöver dig i dag, oh Mandy
Let us know if you feel any younger after belting this out in your shower.
We out.
