Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world's only daily column that's having tea and strumpets - we mean tea and crumpets!
Overheard in the newsroom, there was much ado about strumpets and crumpets - and which one actually has with tea.
It turns out that a crumpet is, in fact, a food: "a round, unsweetened bread resembling a muffin, cooked on a griddle or the like, and often toasted."
A strumpet, on the other hand, is a prostitute.
Guess we're not having tea and strumpets over here.
Here's a caveat, though. According to British slang, a crumpet is also a sexually attractive woman. So, then, we're not terribly far off in our confusion, eh?
Then again, a strumpet isn't necessarily attractive, whereas the slang crumpet is. So, we can have tea and crumpets, whether we're having tea and muffin-like bread or tea and a sexually attractive woman.
We think we should probably stop there, and move on to something much more harmless: Thanking Mr. Dick Berry for being such an altruistic gent, taking the SDN staff under his wing and offering baked goods week after week to the starving among us.
On Thursday, he dropped off angel food cake and an assortment of muffins. We desk monkeys nibble on these gifts as though they're manna from heaven, since it's tough to dechain ourselves from the desk to get real food.
With that, we're out. Presumably to nab some grub.