Williams: How to die in Summit County in only three simple steps | SummitDaily.com

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Williams: How to die in Summit County in only three simple steps

There are many ways to die in Summit County. Hiking with antlers on your head during elk hunting season; playing blind man’s bluff on top of Mount Royal. Or one of my all-time favorite, the moose photo shoot.

Step 1: Approach the moose as though you were in a petting zoo. Ignore the fact that the bull moose has lost the velvet fur on their paddles (antlers); which means they are even more aggressive than normal because it is rutting (mating) season.

Step 2: Move closer to the moose so you can get a great photo. Be sure to look down at your camera after each photo shot so you know that you got a good one. Never bother to look up at the bull moose that is glaring at you only 30 feet away.

Step 3: For safety, stand behind some spindly aspen trees. Forget the fact that a 1,000 pound moose can run at 35 mph (Usian Bolt 200 meter world record run was 23.35 mph). And forget that the moose can run through those aspen trees like a football team running through a paper banner at the start of a game.

Follow these three simple steps (despite a warning from the author) and you will give your friends and family decades of storytelling. That is to say how you died while taking a close up photo of a bull moose.

Welcome to Summit County and have a nice day.