Dr. Jeff Johnson: Architect takeover in Breck? | SummitDaily.com

Dr. Jeff Johnson: Architect takeover in Breck?

So did you cats hear about the turf war in Leadville between the cops and the firefighters? Crazy, baby, crazy. But it’s nothing compared to what’s going down in Breck. See, we psychiatrists are splitsville with all the architects crowding in on our turf, pimping their blueprints and plans.

Blueprints are for squares, daddy-o, and we shrinks are out for blood. You wanna rumble? Well, do ya? Meet us out in the Ski-Vue Liquors parking lot after midnight, and be ready to dance, babe. Go ahead and bring your protractors and compasses, your 5-foot-long rolls of plans and your hot-to-trot receptionists. We’ll drop a truckload of EST on your sorry butts.

Yeah. And if all that doesn’t work, get ready for primal scream, dad. You ain’t suffered until you’ve had a shrink shove a fistful of repressed childhood woe and Oedipal tendencies down your throat.

You cats think you’re hip, with your big hero Frank Lloyd Wright. Ever hear of Jung? How about Skinner? We’ll turn your tiny minds to putty, baby.

Cops and firefighters in Leadville? That stuff is for babies and old ladies. The real deal is set to go down right here in Breck, dad. Be there or be square.

“When you’re a shrink/you’re a shrink all the way/ from your first cigarette/to your last dying day…”

Remember; it’s not your fault

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