Summit Up 04-03-2011: Where we are celebrating National Window Safety Week
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that is thinking back on that one time, when, as little baby columnists, we went plunging out of a second story window. Miracle of miracles, we happened to land on the trampoline strategically positioned in the yard below and bounced right back up, unharmed, into our mother’s arms.
OK, that never happened. But it could, and if it did, the little tyke who did the falling might not be so lucky as to land on a trampoline.
Which is probably why those super-smart folks down at the capitol building gave us National Window Safety Week, which kicks off today. Kathy Ziprik of Simonton Windows writes thusly:
“Families with small children should pay special attention to windows and patio doors. Start with practicing home emergency fire drills. Show them the fastest safety route to the outside and make certain children know under what circumstances to use a window to exit a home. Since small children tend to hide from fire, make sure they understand how important it is to safely and quickly exit the home should a fire occur.
“Along with practicing for emergency situations, daily window safety can be achieved by doing the following:
• When windows are opened for ventilation, only open what young children cannot reach, such as the top portion of a double hung window.
• Keep furniture (including cribs), or anything children can climb, away from windows.
• Remember the primary purpose of a window screen is to keep insects outside. Never push on screens, as they will not support the weight of a child or family pet.
• Lock windows when not in use to protect against intruders and make it more difficult for curious young children to open windows.
• Do not paint or nail windows shut. Every window in the home that is designed to be opened should be operational in case of an emergency.
• Refrain from nailing or attaching decorative lights to the interior or exterior of window frames.
• Plant shrubs or grass, and place “soft landscaping” like bark or mulch, directly underneath windows to help lessen the impact should someone accidentally fall out of a window.” (Trampolines work as well.)
Thanks guys, that was very informative. And remember, kids: When in doubt, stop, drop and try not to roll out the window.
Now, folks, yesterday we gave a particularly long-winded spiel on our beef with bananas and other fruit frustrations (yes, we are masters of alliteration, that’s why they give us space in the newspaper and pay us the big bucks. Well … the first one at least). Anywho, our food can be as aggravating as a teething toddler sometimes (oh! And the alliterations just keep on comin!), and it is heartbreaking to crack open a fine looking avocado, your tongue primed for some creamy guac it mistakenly believes to be just moments away, only to find a gooey black mess and maybe something living in there. But even so, we must admit we do enjoy a good food-challenge every now and again.
Now before you Millions of Summit Up Readers get to gagging, as you flash back to the horrifying second challenge segment of Fear Factor when those poor souls had to eat unspeakable stuff like spiders and 100-year-old quail eggs and, in one memorable episode, something that looked suspiciously like the result of the time we attempted to cook meatloaf, that’s not what we’re talking about.
Collective sigh of relief.
No, what we mean is, sometimes it’s fun to have to work for your food. It makes that one succulent bite of crab meat you get after 6.72 hours of fighting with the crab leg shells, tearing your fingers to shreds and generally making a spectacle of yourself, all worth it. In fact, we propose that the one salvageable bite of crab meat tastes better after the shell-smack-down than if they had presented a whole pound of crab to you with a flower on a nice bed of greens.
It’s like that view from the top of the peak you just climbed. It’s just so much better than looking at your friend’s pictures. You gotta haul your own butt up the 6,000 feet and see it for yourself. You gotta earn it.
MSUR: Sorry you lost us, how are mountaintop views like sushi?
SU: You gotta earn ’em! We have never figured out how to operate chopsticks, which is very embarrassing when our Japanese friends come to dinner, and also, when, after dueling with a Philadelphia roll, growing hungry enough to consider spearing the damn thing with one of our chopsticks and just putting it in our mouth, we finally get it off the plate in what looks like the proper style. And then, pretty much inevitably, we will squeeze too hard or lose our balance and send the slippery morsel rocketing into the face of the person across the table, who, we know from experience, probably isn’t going to be calling for a second date.
But! On that rare occasion when we do get the sushi from the plate to our mouths, without giving up and asking for a fork, it tastes like victory!
Millions of concerned stares.
OK, moving right along to our comment portion of the show, we got a lovely note, actually, two lovely notes from reader Charlotte Clarke who had some questions on the April Fool’s edition of the Summit Daily. Ms. Clarke writes:
“Re: I don’t care if it IS Apr 1 –
“Yeah, yeah, summituppers – the pink gorilla should have been in the wrap; not in the real paper, but I forgive you.
“HOWEVER! What the heck is the photo of a guy “saber” ing a bottle of champagne supposed to be? (Pg. B-2) Some of us are not wine aficionados and don’t have a clue as to what this type of saber is and exactly what he is doing. Fill us in please!”
Well, Charlotte, what the man is doing in that photograph is an awesome party trick in which the top of a champagne bottle is sliced clean off with a very sharp knife. For a full sequence of how it’s done try watching the movie What Happens in Vegas. Cameron Diaz’s character shows a couple of champagne bottles what’s what over the course of the film.
As to the pink gorilla, alas, we ran out of space in the wrap and had to save some funny stuff for the dear ol’ regular SDN. Our deepest apologies.
Ms. Clarke goes on to write in her second lovely note:
“Re: And while you’re at it…
“In this time of short funds – a deal is always good news, right? Well the Alliance for Historical Preservation is conducting a 2 hour tour of the Iowa Hydraulic Placer (best exhibit in the world according to one magazine), this Saturday, April 9, for a measly donation of $5. Tour leader is mining book author Charlotte Clarke.
“Meet at 10 AM at Valley View and Airport Road. Bring snowshoes and ski poles. Call (970) 370-5726 for information or to make a reservation.”
Thanks for the info, we just may do that.
Ladies and gents, it’s Sunday. The day of rest, spring skiing and baseball. You handle the first two because we will be busy with the third.
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