December 26, 2005
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column whose head is still ringing with the echoes of Christmas carols. Oh, wait a minute, those aren’t echoes, it’s the CD stuck in back of the CD player that starts to play at random moments, like at 3 a.m. Christmas morning, when everyone in the house was sure that Santa really had come to town, as “White Christmas” started belting ouf of the stereo at full volume. We’re actually glad that we found the CD stuck back there, wedged in between the turntable and the plastic housing, because for a few days there, we thought we were either, A) going out of our minds because we couldn’t figure out where the music was coming from, or B) had a haunted stereo system, because everytime one of our non-tradtional music selections stopped playing, this Christmas music would start up.
So the moral of this story is, don’t let kids under 10 mess around with the stereo (or any other electronic equipment) because they have a tendency to shove strange objects, like toothbrushes into VCR’s, for example, into places where they don’t belong.Reports are starting to trickle in from our field agents around the country, and we’d like to pass on some of this critical information to you. From Atlanta, for example, we hear that the snow came in liquid form this year, with temps in the 50s it was too warm for the frozen version. Thanks for that update Valerie, and have a safe trip to the High Country. Be sure to stop in and say hello here at Summit Up headquarters in person, so we can regale you with further stories of holiday debauchery.
Hmmmm, we’re not too sure about the next item here, but we’ll include it anyway. One of our observant Breckenridge readers sent this in, caliing it a Dumb@$$ Alert! That may be a little bit too harsh, so we’d prefer to think of it as an important public service announcement:”Our honored guests provide us with endless entertainment, but this one tops everything I know of. I was waiting for the ski area bus across the street from the bottom of Four O’Clock Run when I saw an SUV driving down the bottom of the ski run. I think the four or five skiers and snowboarders who were at the bottom of the run may have said something to the ‘driver.’ I certainly did when he turned right and his open window was facing me. Sir, if you’re reading this, please, next time you visit, take the van from the airport and utilize Summit County’s convenient free transportation, because driving here is obviously more than you are able to handle and you might hurt somebody next time.”Well, based on the fact that someone else recently got a ticket for driving on the Beach at A-Basin, we’re starting to think this activity might be more than just an anomoly. Maybe it’s some kind of new event or sport that we just haven’t heard of yet, but we say rather than scorning it, we should embrace it. Change is good. Maybe Summit County could make this its very own signature, trademark winter activity, market it and make tons of money and then we could all retire early and move to a REAL ski town, like Driggs, Idaho.
Or maybe not, but in any case, the whole “driving on the ski trail” gig probably goes hand it hand with another slightly disturbing trend we’ve seen recently, that being the “driving your car with your ski goggles on.”What’s up with that? We see people all the time, in neighborhoods all over the county, zipping down residential lanes with their windows rolled up and ski goggle on. Very mysterious. Did they forget you sunglasses? Are they trying to hide bloodshot eyes? Or maybe it’s just the snow country equivalent of driving to the beach with your swim trunks on.We are outta here, getting ready to buy or favorite postal employee a holiday eggnog drink.