Summit Up 12-10-10: Busy decorating our Christmas rock garden |

Summit Up 12-10-10: Busy decorating our Christmas rock garden

by Summit Up
Student Melissa Cossack works on a client's hair while wearing a lighted and decorated Christmas tree hairdo at the Cheeks International Academy of Beauty Culture on Wednesday, Dec. 8, 2010 in Cheyenne, Wyo. (AP Photo/The Wyoming Tribune Eagle, Michael Smith)
AP | Wyoming Tribune Eagle

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s trying to figger out what to do about a Christmas tree this year. Chopping down a live tree (or buying same) seems more or less evil, since we really like trees and think the practice of killing them for a few weeks’ eye candy is silly and wrong. On the other hand, those fake trees are probably made of all kinds of endocrine-disrupting chemicals and assembled by regularly whipped workers making 20 cents a week in sweatshops located inside extinct volcanoes.

What to do? What’s something tree-like we can decorate without guilt? We like the idea presented by the woman in the photo above, but we simply don’t have the hair volume to make such a thing work (no matter how many gallons of “volumizing conditioner” we dump on our heads every morning in the shower).

We could decorate some rocks, which are sorta related to trees. They’re plentiful, free and more or less impervious to anything we can dole out. On the other hand, they’re not quite as “sexy” or “cute” as trees, are they? Somehow, constructing some kind of cairn in our living room and stringing lights on it might smack of desperation or weirdness.

Howzabout we tape together a bunch of cereal boxes in a pyramid shape? Or we could pile up our dirty laundry and hang some garland on it, hoping against hope we get lotsa new clothes for Christmas. Perhaps we might just decorate the trees in our yard and put the gifts out there for a few minutes on Christmas morning. Grab a couple of photos, tote the gifts inside and voila! We’ve had a Christmas tree without the killing or endocrine-disruption.

Any other suggestions on alt_xmas trees shoot us a flondamail at

(We’re trying to see if we can get “flondamail” to catch on instead of “e-mail,” cuz we’re sick of e-mail. Let’s see how it goes, shall we?)


OK, we know we’ve spoken a lot recently about the whole Wassail thing going on in Frisco. We’ve been out to a lot of different businesses trying out the various Wassails, and we’re here to tell you these folks are serious about putting out some kick-booty Wassail! It’s yummy stuff, so if you get a chance we highly recommend checking it out. Vote for your favorite – we think the voting ends this weekend some time.

On that note, we’ve gotta bail. Have a most excellent Friday and be safe and eat your greens and get plenty of rest. We out.

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