Summit Up 12-22-10: Visions of cheap junk dancing in our heads | SummitDaily.com
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Summit Up 12-22-10: Visions of cheap junk dancing in our heads

by Scott Calvin
Special to the Daily
ALL |

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s starting to get a little stoked about how close to Christmas we are. We’re hoping for some good stuff under the tree, like a can of chunky chicken noodle soup, a quart of oil, a vegetable peeler and maybe a gallon or two of windshield washer juice.

We’re simple folks; our needs are basic and pure.

Just kidding! We want all kinds of ‘lectronics and books and sugar plums and Red Rider BB guns and puppies and fuzzy sweaters and all that good stuff. Oh, and all the cheap crap China can produce, we want it under the tree!

***

OK, let’s jump right into it with a nice, juicy Scum Alert! to liven up your holidays. Steven Soule of Dillon writes thusly:

“I was just coming out of Blue Moon Bakery in Silverthorne (great sandwich by the way) and saw the driver of your Summit Daily News papers drop off, in the dispenser, a nice big stack of papers. Seconds later, a four-door white sedan drove up and took every last one of the papers before I could get one.

“How rude! Im willing to bet they will just be burning them. Scum like that usually cant read anyway. To whomever that was, thanks a lot. You could have at least left a few for others.”

Sheesh – we never realized anyone would do something so loooowwww. We put the papers out there for free not so jackasses in white sedans can make bonfires, but so people have something to read! Fer the love-a cryin’ out loud – one per customer! Or mark our words … we’ll start charging like a nickel or something for these damn things!

(Just kidding.)

***

To even things out, here’s an Angel Alert! from Tom Castrigno of Frisco, who says this:

I want to give a Huge Summit Up Shout Out to Janice over at Americana Properties in Dillon. She was so helpful and friendly, I can’t thank her enough for the time and care she took with me. If you need a vaction rental, or have a home you want managed by a great company, give Americana a call. They will take care of you!”

There you have it.

***

And here’s a Double Smarty Pants Alert! going out to Brittany Perkins of Breckenridge and Jenna Sheely of Frisco, recent graduates of Western State College over there in Gunnysack. Brittany recently scored a bachelor of arts degree (cum laude!) in environmental studies and Jenna nabbed a sheepskin in politics and government. Corngranulations to both, smarty pants badges all around!

And we hear recently engaged State Sen. Dan Gibbs, himself a Western State grad, was on hand to deliver the commencement address.

Is there anything this man can’t do? He’s like a Renaissance man! We wouldn’t be surprised to learn that, after the commencement address he flew in a jetpack over to Kabul to deliver some Christmas treats to the troops then sallied over to Fiji to pick some orchids for his fiancee.

Amazing.

***

So dang, it was a flippin’ nightmare out on I-70 Tuesday, eh? First one tanker truck rolls over just under the highway in Silverthorne, then another comes barrelling down from the tunnel and dumps something scary called “liquid blasting agent” all over the joint.

Sometimes it seems like the trucking industry has a big, fat bull’s-eye on Summit County or something. We hope all this can get mopped up quick and that the fish and foliage don’t suffer too much.

Sheesh. We out.


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