Summit Up 12-31-09 |

Summit Up 12-31-09

by The Baby New Year

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that made it through another year! Woo-hoo!

(sound of cheering)

Yep, that means we cranked out 365 of these suckers in 2009. And heck, it seems like just yesterday we were talking about the New Year (which we’ll be doing soon enough, again, anyway). Why is it, we wonder, that people get all worked up about the changing of the digits this time of year? It’s not a surprise or anything; happens annually. But, like the weather, we sometimes enjoy talking about the obvious stuff around us. Must be some human thing – roll with it.


There is so much stuff going on tonight, it’s not even funny (or maybe it is – depends on your sense of humor). Somehow, we always wind up stuck at home watching one of those god-awful countdown shows that always have the worst – and we mean the friggin’ worst – bands imaginable. Why can’t they have some kind of cool NYE show with good, modern bands that A) aren’t comprised of people still in their teens; 17) don’t feature some dude in a big dorky cowboy hat or zii) have written new music in the past 20 years?

We’re not sure. But it does seem like, in the producers’ quests to please a broad audience, they please exactly no one (except for Miley Cyrus fans and the like). Perhaps this year we’ll just watch some old favorite movie and turn in early. But the rest of you should all get out there and have fun! Just be careful and don’t over-tipple and think about driving. Johnny Law will get you!


One thing we don’t get about NYE is why we have to sing that Old Lamb’s Eye song.

Should old acquaintances be forgot

Then spit in the old lamb’s eye

What the heck? What did the old lamb ever do to deserve that kind of treatment? Where do you come up with an old lamb, anyway, unless you live on a farm or something?

No answers here, folks – just questions. So, so many questions.


Here’s another thing about NYE: Who wants to drink cheap, crappy Champagne at midnight? Oh, sure, we could try some more expensive stuff, but if there’s one thing we’ve learned in this life, it’s this: Even fancy, expensive Champagne doesn’t taste nearly as great as it’s supposed to. You take a sip, and you sort of expect to see fireworks or something – a party in your mouth. But instead it’s just, y’know, so-so. Maybe we’re Philistines, or maybe the advent of commonly available carbonated beverages has made Champagne not so special. But even so, we say go for the crappy stuff. It’ll suck either way – especially if you still have that Miley Cyrus song stuck in your head.

We out. Be safe tonight folks.

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