Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s nude on the beach in our minds.There we are, naked as newborns under a bright, mid-day sun. Also in our minds, we are surrounded by other people who are equally exposed.Tall turquoise waves blend with the sand – a shattered ivory – as they crash toward our feet, sucking our foundations from beneath us as the tickling edge of salty translucence gravitates back into its grand mass leaving our skin slightly sticky, like the juice from a mango has trickled down from our knees.
There are fruit trees and coconuts. Some of the bodies are dancing, while others have entered the water to experience its steady force.Our mind is happy about all of this until we see a group of tourists, mostly Americans, pointing their cameras and fingers at us; their faces flush with gross grins.Now we’re running into the trees to escape the ugly feelings we’re receiving. Our legs are churning, but they still see us. We run up into the hills, rest by the rivers, squish through the marshes and collapse into the forests on the high mountainside. We are hidden there until all of the trees, in a matter of seconds, turn brown and emaciated until they crumble around us into piles of dry mulch.
And when the dust settles, all that’s left are a bunch of obese beetles and us, still naked. The beetles wiggle and writhe. They seem to be laughing at us, and, inexplicably, some of them have cameras and …We snap out of our bipolarized fantasy-mare.***Uh oh. We have a Scum Alert!! Scum Alert!! Tara wrote in for her friend: “Sadie from the Breckenridge Brewery wants to say to the two punks who walked out on their $50 dinner tab on (last) Saturday night: ‘Thanks a lot! To the next person who sees a blonde guy in neon green and pink snow pants … Charge ’em double! Bad fashion sense and bad karma to you!!!'”
***We have to balance this situation somehow, but we don’t have any Angel Alerts. So, we’ll have to settle for a cute and quirky tidbit. We received this e-mail from an anonymous source, and felt it was worth an ogle: “Whoever owns Bongo Billy’s Café in Salida, Colo., must just love kids. A sign by the cash register announces, ‘Unaccompanied children will be given an Espresso and a free puppy.'”***We’re out, making plans to save the world, starting with our local forests.
Support Local Journalism
Support Local Journalism
As a Summit Daily News reader, you make our work possible.
Now more than ever, your financial support is critical to help us keep our communities informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having on our residents and businesses. Every contribution, no matter the size, will make a difference.
Your donation will be used exclusively to support quality, local journalism.
Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.
User Legend: Moderator Trusted User