Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column … what’s that? … that’s interesting … OK, now we’re curious … we’re gonna see if this theory holds any water … we’re ending this edition of Summit Up right now. Ready?We out, typing periods …Nope, didn’t work. Sorry. Still plenty of space to fill. Ah well, any good theory is only as good as the theorist who dreamed it up, and we’re happy, in the name of linguistics, to put all such theories to a good hard practical test, the NEPA of writing. All we can say is kudos to the hard-working people here who actually deal with the nuts and bolts of putting the paper together. It’s plenty easy to blurt out a few hundred words on a keyboard, especially on this high-tech, super-modern computer gear we get to use here at the Corporate Suites. But it’s another thing altogether to make it all fit so seamlessly.Anyway, It’s not like the old days, when we scratched out meandering sentences with a porcupine-quill pen by the light of a whale-blubber-fueled lantern and sent them via carrier pigeon to the royal scribe, who passed them on to the Town Crier, who then gathered all the village folk in the square and read out the day’s news: Hear Ye! Hear Ye … And if you think about it, we’re kind of going back to that old school of communication with the advent of podcasting technology, which, if you think about it, is really just an updated version of the old Town Crier method. So with that in mind, we’d like to hear from our readers. How many of you would like to get Summit Up as a daily podcast, delivered directly to your iTunes library, ready to be downloaded to your portable MP3 player? Wouldn’t that be cool? We’d also like to know if you listen to podcasts at all, and if so, what kind? Drop us a line here at email@example.com, or give us a holler at (970) 668-4630 and tell us all about podcasting.Seriously. We’re thinking about it … We just want to know if you’d listen.***Bill G. – our UFO reporter who spotted one recently above Keystone – wrote in again to refute the letter “claiming that the UFOs I saw the other Friday afternoon were actually white pelicans.”He explains: “You might as well have said they were stray lightweight Christmas ornaments. White pelicans my earse. I am about 98 percent convinced that you are an agent of the government – a secret agent, that is – I mean, who actually owns high-powered binoculars? It was the use of the technological terminology, “high-powered,” that was a giveaway, my dear Colonel. Seriously folks, I am writing this to declare, to solemnly state for the public record, that I am an official idiot, an inarguable jackass, and should I ever say otherwise I do hereby authorize any member of the same public to refer to this, my honest testimony, signed this day May 24th, 2006, William Morris Given, IV, yours very sincerely & very much ashamed of myself.”Well then. Don’t let that stop you from writing, Bill G. It’s never stopped us … ***Robin Robson of Dillon wrote in with a Scum Alert! Scum Alert! “My family is making an attempt to clean up Swan Mountain Road. It is a daunting task as much of the trash has been pushed over the side by the plows and going up and down the steep sides to retrieve it has been fairly time consuming. (We would really appreciate any help we can get). But to the point, after spending last Sunday getting from the Keystone side to the top of the first curve, I drove over on Monday and saw a new can where we had just cleaned. What is wrong with these people? Please give us a break, and throw your trash in the many receptacles found in our community.”Amen, Robin. There are so many things wrong with beer cans in the ditch that we don’t know where to begin. We found two Jagermeister bottles on Highway 9 during County Clean-Up Day, too. As if drinking and driving was bad enough, now there’s littering under the influence …***We out … really.
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