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Summit Up

Good morning, and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column wondering, do men chunder Down Under? And if so, what does that mean?

We’re feeling very safe today here in the Homeland of Summit Up Security. We recently learned that the to-go bags at our favorite local restaurant come with (drumroll, please) S a born-on date!

Whew, for a little while there, we were worried we might end up with a papyrus-style microbe because our to-go bag was past the expiration date and had spoiled.

Incidentally, the bags also are stamped with the name of the individual worker who made the bag.

Now that’s taking pride in your work. It’s a nice bonus for the inner reviewer in all of us, too. If your paper sack was crafted with exceptional precision, you can call the company and speak directly to the bag’s creator to let him or her know what a fab-ooo job they’re doing.

“Thanks, Bartholomew! I just wanted to let you know the sack you created was magnifico! It cradled my taco flawlessly!”


Speaking of feedback, welcome to another session of “Fun with Front Page Faux Pas.”

A big Summit Up thank you goes out to all those people who courteously pointed out that we had misidentified Mount Helen as Quandary Peak the other day.

Now, now – we know you think we’re being facetious, but we assure you, our thanks is heartfelt.

We’re most appreciative of the phone call we got from “that guy” who declined to leave his name.

“That guy” kindly let us know that the mountain in the photo was not Quandary Peak but was, in fact, Mount St. Helens.

The Department of Irony is investigating.

In the future, to prevent such mistakes, we will avoid naming anything at all. From this day forth, all Summit Daily News photo captions shall read: “Somebody did something somewhere.”

If you’ve got the huevos to own up to the fact that you, too, are the child of a lesser god, give us a jingle at (970) 661-12 S no wait! Make that (921) 293-83 S hold it! That’s not it either. Oh yeah! (970) 668-3998, ext. 237, or just give birth to some typos at


Yes, there are still honest people in the world, Molly tells us. This Angel Alert!! Angel Alert!! goes to the person who found Molly’s wallet in Safeway and turned it in – with everything still inside – to the customer service desk.

“I would like to tell that angel how happy they made me, and how terrific he or she is,” Molly wrote, and we’re happy to oblige.

We’re proud to have even more good news: An Angel Alert!! Angel Alert!! to the two snowboarders who were walking through the parking rink (it’s pretty icy) at the Summit Daily Monday afternoon when they came across our mail technician, Mary Jo Melvin. Mary Jo was trying to back out of her parking space in one of the company trucks, but she was stuck. When these two boarders saw she was having trouble getting unstuck, they dropped their boards and came to her aid with a push-push shove.

We always think boarders look a bit more stylin’ in wings and halos, so enjoy, boys.


We out checking the dates on the bottoms of all things inanimate.

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