Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that wants to know if you’re sock-sock-shoe-shoe or sock-shoe-sock-shoe.
We’ll explain that, but first repeat the end of that sentence 10 times quickly.
OK, what we’re wondering is whether most people put on their socks first and then their shoes, or if they do it a pairing at a time. We, ourselves, we’re sock-sock. To be more specific, we also go left to right. Always. It has partly to do with our obsessive-compulsive disorder, but it also has to do with the fact that we try to tie our right shoe tighter than our left. This goes back to the days when we kicked pigskins for a living.
We know you find this fascinating, but that’s the whole point: We’re pretty sure there’s some good diagnostic personality information in this superficial trait. It probably says something about the parents or guardians who taught you how to put on your shoes, too.
For instance, if we were to regurgitate all that psycho-babble our therapists (yes, plural) have been telling us over the years, we’d probably say that if you’re sock-sock like us, you’re detail-oriented and likely to take your time getting a job done.
You sock-shoe people are probably always in a rush. And you’re probably seen wandering around your house a lot with what looks like a limp as you’re looking for your other shoe.
But what do we know?
“And, that begs another question,” a fellow sock-sock staffer said. “Are you sit-fold, sit-crinkle, stand-fold or stand-crinkle?”
We probed further on this categorization but found out a lot about our coworkers we just would rather not have known.
Somehow we’ve become the greatest repository for poetry in the mountains. Don’t get us wrong – we love it. We really never knew there were so many wordsmiths out there.
Susan Brind’amour sent us these, commenting they’re “two animal haikus based on things I saw minutes apart the other day.”
Cool versus uncool
a cat along for a ride
in a mini-van
The dog was unleashed
at least he crossed with the light
where is his owner?
A field agent was in the Silverthorne Rec Center (we have to send field agents in there, since we boycott the place on account of the raquetball fees) and overheard a strange snippet while walking briskly past the weight machines on the track:
“He gets more than he gets at home.”
Our agent’s thought: Foot massages, perhaps?
It’s time we start putting out some Holiday Recipes. If you’ve got a good tummy-filling, palate-tickling, family-pleasing concoction, let us know and we’ll pass it on – because we all want to be Julia Child deep in our heart, and not just because we want to be six feet tall and speak with a bird-like English accent.
We’d make this a contest, but that would mean we’d have to bake, boil and whatnot, and if you know us, you know you’d rather have nuclear waste being transported through Summit Up Land on I-70, because it’s much less risky.
So, send your recipes for cakes, soups, roasts, breads, cookies and whatever else to
email@example.com, fax at (970) 668-0755 or just recite it a la that crazy cajun Justin Williams on the voicemail at (970) 668-3998 ext. 237.
It’s Saturday, so you better be relaxing. We’re out at the shoe stores polling people on their dressing habits …
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