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Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column desperately afraid that the world is becoming a tired, cliche-filled replica of itself.

We were going to start off today’s column griping about this mess in the Middle East. The TV’s on behind us here at the Corporate Suites, and we keep hearing about explosions and fire in Bethlehem, how Israel isn’t going to let United Nations inspectors in to see if the Palestinians are telling the truth that the Israelis massacred innocent people in Jenin (and isn’t Saddam supposed to be the one slamming the door on the U.N people?), and blah blah blah blah blah. It’s the same headlines every day – probably because only a handful of people really understand what the heck’s going on over there, and even fewer really care.

But that’s too depressing, we thought. Better find something else to write about. So then we start thinking, maybe we’ll write today’s column about music. Music’s kind of impartial, right? It’s definitely not politically charged like the Middle East thing. But when we start flipping through our newest selections and looking at the music news, all we can find is A) the latest revelation that, weeks before she died in a car accident in Honduras, everybody’s newest-favorite-latest pop star (Lisa “Left-Eye” Lopes) was involved in another car accident that killed a 6-year-old boy, and B) it’s all the same crap crap crap crap crap crap.

“And speaking of MTV,” the staffer in the corner chimes in, “my new favorite show is “Fear’ (where easily scared people are invited to get scared by creepy places – another brilliant concept) and “Fear Factor’ is good, too.”

That’s when it hit us that that’s all people are watching these days: crappy reality TV that’s extremely difficult to distinguish from the seemingly rerun news broadcasts. Then we went from ticked off to depressed looking at this column: the same la-de-da-de-da-de-da.

Can you tell we’ve had a stressful day? Don’t worry, we’re playing hooky today and going out to roll around in the grass, sniff flowers and we might even tip over one of those hotel lobby ashtrays, just so we can have some sand to squish our toes around in.

It’s Thursday, and we suppose we should just be thankful for that. We’re out blowing off steam …


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