Summit Up | SummitDaily.com
YOUR AD HERE »

Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column going into the consulting business.

One of our friends and local drug dealers (he sells us our coffee every morning) suggested all of us make a career change and start peddling plans, surveys and solutions to our local governments. For those who have skipped over the headlines and stories like we have (because they’re pretty boring), seems everybody is hiring consultants these days. Frisco’s using them for an economic plan, the housing authority’s got consultants to figure out what the job of the housing authority should be and on and on. As one letter writer pointed out in yesterday’s paper, it makes you wonder why we elect officials at all if the only thing they’re good for is hiring consultants to figure out what decisions they should make.

So, we’re encouraging you to hire us for all your consulting needs. It doesn’t matter what the topic or problem is. We know how to throw around consultant-speak vocabulary – like “stakeholders,” “strategic plan,” “input,” “mission statement,” “collaborative process,” “alternative analysis” and “interdisciplinary implementation.”



Send your requests for proposals to summitup@summitdaily.com, fax at (970) 668-0755 or just tell us you’ll join our “advisory committee” on the voicemail at (970) 668-3998, ext. 237.

***



“So it was a legitimate 9 inches?” he said.

The woman responded assuredly, “Oh, yeah, it was definitely a legitimate 9 inches.”

At this point, hearing a conversation out of context, we had to restrain ourselves. And, fortunately, we were able to quash those thoughts of sexual harassment complaints, washing mouths out with soap, etc., when the two started talking about wind-blown snow and fresh tracks.

It’s a fine line between porn and a powder day, you know?

***

Congrats! to Frisco’s Elizabeth V. Boyd. She made the dean’s list at Pacific Lutheran University. Rock on, Liz.

***

Buh-dee, buh-dee, buh-dee – that’s all for today. Join us tomorrow for pasta salad recipes, Nostradamus predictions about “The Jenny Jones Show” and other fine journalism fit for tabloids.

We’re out watching all the werewolves come home …


Support Local Journalism

Support Local Journalism

As a Summit Daily News reader, you make our work possible.

Now more than ever, your financial support is critical to help us keep our communities informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having on our residents and businesses. Every contribution, no matter the size, will make a difference.

Your donation will be used exclusively to support quality, local journalism.

 

Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.

User Legend: iconModerator iconTrusted User