Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column worried about all this conspiracy stuff going on – and we’re not talking about comic books getting turned into movies.
In case you haven’t noticed, Hollywood has run out of new ideas. If it’s not a sequel to a movie that was horrible in the first place, or based on a comic book that was created 40 years ago, then it ain’t gettin’ made into a movie these days.
We urge you movie makers out there (they all read this column, you know) to turn your attention, instead, to the stage of world political affairs. We happen to read a lot of newspapers and online news sites (what else are we supposed to do while waiting for our MP3s to download?) and there’s some shady stuff going on in the world.
In case nobody’s noticed, our brave soldiers have yet to find any weapons of mass destruction over in Iraq. This bothers us: A) because they keep getting shot at (the death toll for this military maneuver just surpassed the total for the 1991 Gulf War), and 2) because a certain Commander in Chief said that was the whole reason for packing up our cork guns and heading East.
Things get more interesting when you read all these accounts about the “bad intelligence” all this seems to have been based on (which is, interestingly, diverting a lot of attention from the billions of dollars companies are making, supposedly rebuilding the country). Most recently, the New York Times ran a story Sunday about an Italian journalist coming forward, claiming she’s the person who gave U.S. intelligence people the documents that showed Iraq was trying to get uranium from Africa. The documents, you’ll recall, turned out to be forgeries.
But none of these stories seem to be asking who forged the documents. Not to mention the fact that the Times buried the story on page 14.
Then you’ve got all this stuff about the British weapons inspector. Looks like he “committed suicide” just in time to have his superiors blame him for bad information that led the English to follow us into battle. And, curiously enough, if you go back and read the news stories that were published in between his being reported missing and found dead, they read a lot like the writers knew he was already dead and that officials would call it suicide.
Like we said, don’t know about you, but it all sounds pretty fishy, and at the least, we’ve got enough drama and intrigue for a Tom Clancy book and movie.
Don’t retire yet, Harrison Ford: Your country needs you to make a movie so we can forget, for at least two hours, just how hornswaggled we are.
Congrats! to Kimberley Bowman. Kim made the dean’s list at Tufts University for the spring semester. Kim is a Frisco resident and Summit High grad, and we’ll probably be writing more of these announcements about her in the future.
It’s Monday, once again. Seems like we were just here last week. Let us know what’s good in your part of the world at firstname.lastname@example.org, fax at (970) 668-0755 or just warn us when the Secret Service is coming for us at (970) 668-3998, ext. 237.
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