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Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column rocking out – or perhaps, hippin’ and hoppin’ out would be more appropriate – to the town of Breckenridge’s recorded telephone hold music.The music used to be somber enough to make a clown slit his throat. Funeral dirge, we used to think.But then, we noticed, the economy tanked, and they changed it to an upbeat kind of “Put on a Happy Face” kind of thing. And now, it seems, at least from our short time being on hold, the town’s decided to get with the times and play some be-boppin’ funkalicious hip-hop.Personally, we don’t like it, but it sure keeps you awake while you wait.***Karen Sanderman, aka The Frisco Cow, is fretting over the upcoming Frisco Barbecue Challenge – and not because she thinks she might be on the ol’ Q.Karen, for reasons unknown to us – she’s not a vegetarian – owns a complete cow outfit and actually wears it in public. One of those occasions was the popular barbecue challenge last year, where Karen thought she’d be a hit with kids, Q’ers and other Q fans. (She’s pictured somewhere on this page.)Whoa, nellie!According to her husband, people who had had too much to drink were chasing her with meat cleavers. Another man gave her a firm yank on her udder. Dogs barked at her.She won’t be here this year in light of all that, but we can assure you that the event will be as popular as ever. And next year, we’ll be sure to welcome Karen with open arms.***Employees Nos. 690 and 086 just returned from a long, long hiatus during which they got lost at every turn, which gave them ample opportunity to wonder such things as:) Where did pigeons hang out before there were cities? Did they have better diets?h) Where have all the Stuckey’s gone? We can’t do without our pecan logs!2) And where does all that corn go?Y) If you run across a place that sells “Lots of neat stuff!” do you stop?) Why does South Dakota sell rocks? Doesn’t every state have rocks of its own?)) What are you supposed to do when you read U.S. Army signs reading: “Artillery Firing Over Road in This Area?” Duck? Turn around? Fire back?B) Would you stay overnight at the Ho-Hum Hotel? How about the Tourist Home?-) What kind of redemption do you get at the Backside Redemption Church?$) Do you want the Dunn Funeral Home to take care of your arrangements?@) Where else but Nebraska can you find a camel in someone’s backyard?Needless to say, 6,837 miles later, they wish they were still on the road. Next time, they’ll take a flight.***We’re out soaring …

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