Summit Up 4-22-10: Powered by solar gerbils | SummitDaily.com
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Summit Up 4-22-10: Powered by solar gerbils

by Euell Gibbons
Special to the Daily/Scott Bartlett
ALL |

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s all about Earth Day as we’re sitting here typing in our hemp underwear, using a computer powered by solar gerbils and sipping on a carbon-free latte tofu kinda thing. We’ve got our manure-powered organic light bulbs overhead, a car that runs on bat guano and a tattoo of Al Gore on our left cheek (and we won’t say which one).

Yep, it’s a super earthy low-carbon recyclable kinda day, isn’t it? We’re celebrating by having ultra low-emission orangutans tow us around Frisco in a rickshaw made of old beer cans and cereal packets, and we make stops every now and then to recite various haiku about vermiforming we’ve written for the occasion. We’re saving water by just being thirsty all the time, and we even have our long, ZZ Top-style beard hooked up to a li’l generator, so when the wind blows our whiskers it all goes back to the grid.

Amazing.

We jest, of course. We’re actually sitting here using carbon particles like crazy and sipping out of one of those 3-gallon 7-Eleven cups that looks like it will last until the next geological era. Our pants are made of oil, our food is all beef from the disappearing rain forests and we have a Dick Cheney tattoo on our right cheek (but we won’t say which one).

Or maybe it’s somewhere in between those two things, which is usually the case with us nutty Summit Countians. On one hand we’re driving a hybrid while at the same time we’re flying around the world or eating dolphin flippers for breakfast. Whatever the case, do what you can to mark the day – nay, the year! – and don’t be a meathead about these things. Sometimes it just takes a little thought …

***

We have a Scum Alert! Scum Alert! called in by a concerned reader concerned about snowmobilers highmarking in the Fourth of July Bowl on Peak 10. “they are ruining the snow for the rest of spring for all the skiers through the Fourth of July … ruining it for the rest of the community.”

OK then, maybe you sledders should chill a bit? We’re not sure if that’s kosher or not but …

We’ve gotta run. Cheers!


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