Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column advocating more insane sports.
Just like most of our good readers, we hate how the word “extreme” has been attached to everything outdoors and athletic. All it’s done is bring more yahoos into Summit Up Land and places like it, putting the true hardcores among us at danger with the go-big-or-go-home mindset flailing around us. (We use that “us” word loosely, since we mostly sit on the sidelines and ooh and ahhh.)
But lately, we can’t help but feel there’s something good in all this. We watch “Slamball” whenever we happen to flip to it on TV. For those who haven’t seen it, it’s a combination of hockey, basketball and gymnastics – a basketball game with trampolines and lots of checking. The amazing thing is that there aren’t horrible, tragic injuries every game, which is probably why we watch it; it’s only a matter of time before we see one.
And now the Breck rec center is starting up a dodgeball league. We don’t know what the rules will be exactly, but we’re already having drooling flashbacks of some elementary school games along the same lines. Ah, how good it felt to dive out of the way of those red rubber balls we all had in gym class and escape certain destruction. Oh, how bad it felt to realize with a thwack that you were out and would have to sit on the sidelines.
So, we’ve come up with a few other games we hope the rec leagues will think about trying out. Flood their phones until they relent and let us play:
n Pogo stick polo (or hockey). C’mon, you remember how fun pogo sticks are.
n Earthball rugby. We don’t know about your elementary school, but we had a huge, 8-foot-diameter ball they called an earthball. Imagine scrumming with that thing.
n Quickdraw. This is the Wild West, right? How about some high-noon showdowns with paintball or laser guns?
n Cannonball Run. You saw the movie. Now, imagine a cross-Summit Up Land race in the same vein, except using only golf carts or pack animals. Eat your heart out, Eco Challenge.
n The Running of the Wolves. We’ve suggested it before, and we’re not quitting. If Pamplona can have its bulls, we should be able to do a run at one of the resorts with wolves or lynxes.
n Snowshoe tennis. Actually, we’d watch anything in snowshoes: soccer, softball, jai alai, etc.
If we left anything out, let us know at
email@example.com, fax at (970) 668-0755 or just tell us, like everyone else, we’re crazy on the voicemail at (970) 668-3998, ext. 237.
This Angel Alert!! Angel Alert!! comes from Bill and Mary. Mary was hiking on Buffalo Mountain with her 11-year-old son Ryan. He fell and hurt his ankle “near the top,” Mary says, and he couldn’t walk all the way down. Along comes our hero, Laurie (although we’re not sure of the spelling) from Silverthorne. Being the strong, compassionate mountain woman, Laurie hoisted the boy on her back and carried him down the hill.
“I don’t know her last name, but she was probably about 26 or so, had short brown hair and was super nice. She helped me get my son in the car and told us to have a nice day and was gone. Maybe a real angel … who knows. Anyone who knows maybe who this lady is, please e-mail myself or my husband at firstname.lastname@example.org with how we might can get a hold of her. We will be back this winter to ski and would love to take her to dinner!”
If the dinner date can be made, we’d suggest Angel’s Hollow in Breck, only so Laurie can show off her wings and halo.
It’s Sunday, so we’re out Sundaying …
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