Summit Up 5-28-10: Shouting out to our best friend: the hummingbird
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s being heavily guilted by hummingbirds. See, last year, we pitched our feeder in the fall because it had some kind of fungal sklarge accumulating inside. We know hummers are finicky critters and that they’d never go for nectar dispensed from a sklarge-ridden feeder (and no amount of scrubbing would get it out). This year, we have yet to get a new feeder, and the hummingbirds are zooming around, making their distinctive noise which, to us this year, sounds like “You rotten dorks! Where’s our stuff! Every other house in the ‘hood has their feeder out so where’s yours?! Sheesh! We need our fix! C’mon man!”
We feel bad, but we’ll get it taken care of soon – like this weekend. Because the hummingbirds are, to us, the closest thing we will probably ever have to a pet. And the hummingbirds are, so far as we’re concerned, the perfect pet. They never incur veterinary bills, they don’t require special pillows to sleep upon and they don’t slobber on our pants. We’re not allergic to them, we don’t have to clean up their dookie and, unlike house birds, we don’t have 47 metric tons of sunflower seed shells to clean up every day. Sure, the hummingbirds don’t nuggle up to us on the couch or express joy when we arrive home (or, in the case of cats, masked condescension) and they refuse to compete in “cutest pet” contests no matter how much sugar we bribe them with. But hey, they’re low maintenance and that’s what we like! And more than anything we like the fact that they don’t shove those pointy little beaks into our crotch.
So now that it’s barbecue season, what’s your favorite way to make meat hot? Some smoke, some grill using gas; others swear by charcoal. We here at the Summit Up Central Corporate Suites have the dubious distinction of having this weenie electric grill, which takes like an hour to heat up and takes a good 30 minutes to cook a burger. Oh, and you can only fit like two burgers on it! Needless to say, barbecues around here are laborious affairs characterized by the designated cook coming in with a plate of burgers that disappear in a second, followed by a long wait for more.
But, we did learn some interesting things about our staff Wednesday during our annual clean-up-the-office day BBQ. One Staffer was discovered eating macaroni salad for the first time … ever! She’d just never had the stuff, and we were all amazed, pointing at her like she was some rare species of Argentinian cheetah. Soon after trying it out, though, she felt sick and opined that her macaroni salad days might already be on the wane.
We were also amazed by another Staffer who put mustard on her hot dog in a horizontal, criss-cross fashion rather than the universally accepted method of one vertical strip right down the center of that puppy. And we all recoiled in horror at the Staffer who insisted a cheeseburger couldn’t be consumed without a liberal slathering of Miracle Whip. Blech!
Any bizarre picnic or BBQ customs out there? Let us know at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Next up, we’ve got a Smarty Pants Alert! going out to Rachael Myers, whose folks Brian and Julie Myers live in Dillon. Says here Rachael, who is a sophomore at Cedarville University in Ohio, was named to the Dean’s List for the spring semester. Rachael is majoring in nursing.
Way to go! Keep up the good work, Rachael!
So avid readers, all 3.7 of you, may recall we were blathering in this space recently about ways to stop the oil leak/gusher/spewing event in the Gulf of Mexico, and we had concerns about the BP method called the “Top Kill.” As of Thursday afternoon, we guess it was helping some but there were (and this goes without saying) complications involved in shooting mud at an oil gusher a mile under the ocean surface.
More interestingly, we saw video from Good Morning America online that showed Philippe Cousteau (yes, that Cousteau) diving into the Gulf to take a look at things.
It wasn’t pretty. And we fear for the fate of the shrimp, scallops, beaches, fishermen, etc. etc. along the Gulf Coast. Philippe came out of the drink looking like the tar monster from that old Star Trek episode, and he said it was the worst thing he’d ever seen underwater.
Yikes. Help those folks if you can!
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