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Summit Up


Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only column angry as anything about inmate weddings.We were reading an article titled “Inmate Weddings Popular” and couldn’t help but think inmates shouldn’t be allowed to get married. They’re in jail, for crying out loud! They shouldn’t be allowed to vote, they shouldn’t be allowed to play checkers, they should sit there and think about the horrid things for which they have been incarcerated.We think the ACLU has dropped the ball on this one, what with all the lawsuits that have, in the end, given inmates satellite TV, a library filled with books college students can’t afford and the right to sue their jailers for mistreating them.What ever happened to the days of iron beds and holes in the floor? Whatever happened to – what?Oh.Intimate Weddings Popular.Never mind.???Are you kitty krazy? Take this small quiz:? While on vacation, do you leave messages on your answering machine in hopes your cat will step on the play button and be calmed by your voice coming out of a box? Have you ever returned home to find your message erased?&) Does your cat like to sleep on your head? Do you like it? Why do you continue to let him do it, then? Just who is it that rules your roost, you spineless, yellow-bellied … Ahem. Sorry.+) Do you watch bad TV because the cat’s sleeping on the remote?c) Are you willing to sleep in the same uncomfortable position all night because you don’t want to disturb your cat’s sleep? Does your cat appreciate your thoughtfulness? Of course, he doesn’t, you dolt! He’s a cat! It’s all about him, as far as he’s concerned! Him, him, not you!?) Do you have a variety of rejected cans of cat food in your refrigerator? Have you tried them? Then how do you know if they’re bad?) Do you think it’s cute when your cat brings you an almost-dead rodent and deposits it on your bed? How about on the floor next to your bed?) How about when they puke in your slippers?o) How about when they climb the curtains?j) Do you take your cat to the vet for “well-baby” checkups? And does the vet ever tell you your cat’s looking at little peaked, or underweight, or jaundiced? Never? That’s what we thought.*****Now, this is what we call an Angel Alert!! or Angels Alert!! to be more precise.Skip Diamond, a long-time Breckenridge resident, says she has a lot to be thankful for, most especially good friends and good health. Skip was undergoing cancer treatments at the Shaw Regional Cancer in Edwards. Every day she left her home in Breck to drive Vail Pass to Edwards. And every day, one of her friends drove her. This amazing group of women rallied behind each other, giving love and support.Skip is now in recovery and doing well. Recently, Shaw staff and Vail Valley Medical Center employees treated Skip, her husband, Peter, and her buddies to a special lunch at Shaw. AND, her aforementioned friends raised money on behalf of the cancer center, purchasing an aspen leaf in Skip’s name.Well! Looks like they’re going to have to open up a whole new wing in heaven for all you angels.Your halos are on order.***Just when you were feeling all fuzzy, we have a Scum Alert!! Scum Alert!! for your perusal.Jennifer Pace was playing fetch with her dog, Amber, a 5-year-old yellow lab mix, about 8:45 a.m. Thursday near the Goose Pasture Tarn when a pet-owner’s worst nightmare happened – Amber ran onto Highway 9 and was hit by a car and killed.Jennifer didn’t see the car herself and hopes the person who hit Amber was unaware of their deed. Otherwise they are scum, as are all those who toodle by, oblivious to injured animals lying in the middle of the highway.On that note, we send an Angel Alert! Angel Alert! to a man named Mike, who stopped and carried Amber out of the path of oncoming traffic.Jennifer wants to thank Mike and to send horrible karmic warnings to the thoughtless driver who ran over Amber.???There are 184 days left in the year. Use them wisely.

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