Summit Up 6-15-11: Worst Summit Up column ever written! | SummitDaily.com
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Summit Up 6-15-11: Worst Summit Up column ever written!

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Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that …

Excuse us! We had some wicked hiccups there that were giving us whiplash for a second! Holy crow!

or …

Actually, we have this “macro” on our keyboard that types in the Summit Up salutation automatically, and we’ve had a slight onset of Tourette’s, and it made us type it over and over by mistaked while another unnamed mental ailment we have prevents us from ever going back and changing anything. So you’re stuck with it, for now.

or …

The real reason we typed that stuff over and over is that we’re experimenting with making the Summit Up column more of a performance arts piece, and since we couldn’t strike angular poses and play any weird music to set the mood, we figured that was the best we could do. Whaddaya think? Too abstract?

or …

Another reason for that kind of serial repetition is that now, on June 15, 2011, after writing this column for something like the past 22 years, we have finally just plum (or is it plumb?) run out of ideas. We’re out, tapped, dry, kaput, outta gas. We couldn’t come up with one more original idea if you stuck a banana to our head. Or a gun. This is it. We’re not even sure how we’re going to fill in the rest of this space, even with this giant pie ad taking up a bunch of room in the middle.

MILLIONS OF SUMMIT UP READERS: Oh just shut up and write!

SU: Good advice. We’ve long believe the phenomenon of writer’s block is a myth invented by professors of creative writing who simply want more asses in seats at their high-priced seminars and workshops. If writer’s block really exists, how come there are like 90 bazillion books in the library and online and everywhere else? Even if all one can create is a bunch of navel-gazing BS about how we can’t think of anything more to write, even that’s something, right? Write?

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that …

MSUR: Now you’re just being lazy.

SU: It’s only because we’d rather be outside. Can we have class outside today?

MSUR: No!

SU: Please!

MSUR: No!

SU: Woo-hoo! We’re at the end. See you at the park!


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