Summit Up 6-19-10: Deafened by vuvuzelas
Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that’s tooting our vuvuzela til the cows come home – we’re not sure why. And no, we’re not talking about a South American slang term for some unmentionable body part. The vuvuzela (say it aloud, it’s fun: voo-vah-zayla!) is that super-annoying horn people at soccer games feel compelled to toot at all times, imbuing the soundtrack of a soccer game with an undertone that sounds like a 1,000 swarms of angry hornets. Universally despised, near as we can tell, it’s still a necessary accoutrement for anyone showing up at a soccer game – kinda like the old air horn is at American football games. Although at least American football fans have the decency to only blare their horn when something cool happens.
Anyway, we came across something online that allows you to filter out the sound of vuvuzelas if you are tech-savvy enough (we’re pretty sure we’re not, but we’re not planning on watching any soccer games either). Go to http://www.youttube.com and search for “vuvuzela remover.” If you figure it out and make it work, we’ll be happy for you.
BTW: We found some info on the AP about the inventor of the vuvuzela, picture at right. His name is Neil Van Schalkwyk (a nickel to you if you can pronounce his name correctly – or at all), and he’s the guy responsible for these things, if you want to direct your ire in any particular direction. That said, he’s now rich, cuz he’s sold a bazillion of these stupid things – and they’re even starting to show up at American baseball games.
Speaking of annoying, it’s Friday morning, the Frisco Barbecue Challenge is starting and that shouting guy from the Big Red Bus is set up aside our office and he’s yelling stuff about something. He kinda reminds us of that dude from the OxiClean commercials, Billy Mays (may he rest in peace). Only the Big Red Bus guy has a microphone hooked up to a very powerful PA system, which makes us wonder why he thinks he has to shout everything.
WE HAVE A SUGGESTION FOR YOU, BIG RED BUS GUY: TRY SAYING STUFF NORMALLY AND JUST SEE IF PEOPLE CAN STILL HEAR YOU. WE BET THEY CAN, AND THEY WILL THANK YOU FOR NOT YELLING AT THEM! THAT’S OUR ADVICE! IF YOU DO SO, WE PROMISE TO STOP WRITING IN ALL CAPS!
That said, we know your heart’s in the right place and you’re just trying to provide some entertainment. We just ask you to tone it down a notch – especially when you’re parked outside our office!
THERE’S A RIB WITH OUR NAME ON IT OUT THERE. BYE!
Support Local Journalism
Support Local Journalism
As a Summit Daily News reader, you make our work possible.
Now more than ever, your financial support is critical to help us keep our communities informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having on our residents and businesses. Every contribution, no matter the size, will make a difference.
Your donation will be used exclusively to support quality, local journalism.
Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.
User Legend: Moderator Trusted User