Summit Up 7-16-11: Oppressed by paper towels |

Summit Up 7-16-11: Oppressed by paper towels

by Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that has only a long, narrow window of opportunity today to construct a mostly pointless diatribe about paper towels.

For starters, your typical tri-fold paper towel is too small for one basic hand-drying episode, yet using two seems like overkill. For all you paper towel manufacturers out there reading this, we suggest you create a new towel size that’s roughly 150 percent of the current size. That way we can get by with just one towel instead of two and thereby saving 50 percent of the amount of paper used. We think.

So often when we’re in public restrooms we’re surrounded by other people expressing exasperation at the paper towel dispensers. As they get more and more fancy (i.e., they no longer are the simple tri-fold towel but, rather, have elaborate dispensing systems aimed at … we’re not sure what) we find ourselves wiping our hands on our pants rather than suffer through the frustration and humiliation of trying to extract paper either by waving our hand mysteriously in front of the electric eye part of the machine, or trying to spin some stupid little wheel with dripping hands or tearing at the roll only to come up with a square of paper about the size of a postage stamp.

What’s wrong with the world today that we can’t come up with a decent way to dry our hands in a public restroom??? The best solution are the high-powered dryers we see, often at the resorts. But how much coal are we burning to use those things?

Aaagggghhh! We out.

Support Local Journalism

Support Local Journalism

As a Summit Daily News reader, you make our work possible.

Now more than ever, your financial support is critical to help us keep our communities informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having on our residents and businesses. Every contribution, no matter the size, will make a difference.

Your donation will be used exclusively to support quality, local journalism.

For tax deductible donations, click here.

Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.

User Legend: iconModerator iconTrusted User