Summit Up 7-17-10: Where annoying mimes storm the Bastille | SummitDaily.com
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Summit Up 7-17-10: Where annoying mimes storm the Bastille

by Maurice Chevalier
Stephanie Burt writes to remember "our sweetest boy Shadow.He is on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge, which is where animals wait for us to get up to see them.He was a 15 year-old border collie/Australian shepherd mix. A pound puppy who gave us more love and had more fun snowshoeing on the lake, hiking and camping, he was always the first in the car. We will love and miss him forever. He had a lot of friends in Summit County. Run free of all pain our sweet Shadow. Love from your mom, dad, and your sister Lexi. We miss you terribly.
ALL |

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column that says “Vive la France!” on this Bastille Day, 2010. Yep, it was just 221 years ago today that a bunch of angry Frenchmen stormed the prison known as the Bastille, setting off a chain of events that led to the French Revolution. Apparently there were only seven prisoners in the Bastille at the time, but the storming of the Bastille was one of those symbolic things that came to mean greater things.

So, on the Fourth of July, we Americans eat grilled meat, have parades and watch fireworks. What do they do in France on Bastille Day? We’re glad you asked, as we present to you the Top 10 Bastille Day activities in France:

(warning: stereotypes ahead!)

10. World Smoking Tour finals. Powering Gitanes and Gauloises brand cigarettes, France’s top lungs compete to see who’s got what it takes on the World Smoking Tour.

9. Cheesiest, stereotypical Frenchman outfit competition. Out come the berets, the striped boat shirts, the neck scarves and the black pants to see who can look the part the best. (Hint: If you can mime a guy stuck in a glass box dressed in that getup, you’ve got an edge). And speaking of …

8. Annoying mime-off. Dressed as a mime doing annoying mime things, you have to go in the toughest bars of Paris and try to emerge unscathed. Interestingly enough, no one has ever won this in the 220 years of the competition!

7. Handout races: A favorite of Fox News correspondents, French workers scramble to see who can get the most money and vacation time out of the national government in a given year.

6. L’Academie Francaise Renaming Olympics: Contestants work to give silly, complex French names to American things they don’t like the sounds of.

OK, we ran out of stereotype steam, so this is just a Top 5. The main two points we’d like to make, though, are these: Apparently for Bastille Day in France and the other countries where it’s celebrated, it’s mostly parades and fireworks, just like here. The second point is that, if you’re in Summit County, the place to be for Bastille Day is at Le Petite Paris on Adams Ave. in Breckenridge, where you’ll get some great French food and a free glass of Champagne today to mark the occasion. They’re open for dinner, and if you want to make reservations, the number is (970) 547-5335. Allons-y!

***

Have you ever wished that, instead of just being frustrated by lost tourists in their rental cars, you could speak to them, help them out? We were thinking this just yesterday when, while driving down Main Street in Frisco, we were trapped behind a guy from Florida who was going .02 mph in his quest for … we’re not sure what. We wanted to just be able to call him on his cell or something and say “Just tell us where you want to go and we’ll help!” Instead, we fumed behind him as the green light changed to amber, then red. Then, of course, Florida guy figured out Breck was a right turn, and he zoomed off while we sat there thinking how very much we love tourists.

Some day, maybe they can put a code on the rental cars that we locals can call to get a hold of people to help them on their way. No one would abuse that, would they?

***

Well, here it is Wednesday already, and we’re already gearing up for the weekend – now just two days away! There’s a cool new show at the Backstage Theatre (The Menopause Monologues) directed by Wendy Moore and written by local B.J. Knapp, plus a new Leo DiCaprio movie that’s supposed to be awesome (Inception). Oh, and mountains and streams and stuff if you want to go outside. Au revoir!


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