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Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column thinking about what we can bring back to our good readers from the other side of the world.

We’re currently preparing a contingent of field agents for a voyage to South America. Regular readers will recall we sent an expeditionary force to the jungles of Central America last year. This group returned with much wisdom gathered from indigenous peoples: “Don’t scratch it,” “Everything here moves” and “They can never steal your memories,” were among the most popular adages.

We decided to head south of the equator this year, since everyone should see toilets swirl in the opposite direction at least once in their lives.

But we thought if we’re going to give our agents reconnaissance assignments, they should come from our readers. So tell us whether you want pictures of the animals, a review of the club sandwiches at local bordellos, funny road signs or just the calculation of the average number of teeth in any given citizen’s head.

Send your requests to, fax at (970) 668-0755 or just sing a tango on the voicemail at (970) 668-3998 ext. 237.


Somebody must have been down by the lake taking in the sights. This Mystery Poem comes from a prominent Summit Up Land citizen. Go ahead and guess the author’s identity as you read:

The all-American

weed-eating goats

with rock star popularity

appear as small boulders

next to the lake

as they munch their way

into infamy.

You may think you hear snapping fingers and espresso-sipping, but that’s just the way we beatniks applaud.


Calling parents of college-bound kids: Our education reporter is interested in finding any of you who’d be willing to be subjects for a story about that joyful/tearful experience. Call our automated operator at (970) 668-3998 and ask for Reid Williams.


Call us anything, just don’t call us tardy for Thursday. It is Thursday, right?

We’re out teaching these field agents how to ask for their pants back in Spanish …

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