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Summit Up

Good morning and welcome to Summit Up, the world’s only daily column here to balance the scales, do its business and get out.

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Jake’s Mom e-mailed in this Scum Alert!! Scum Alert!! “for the slime bag that stole my 9-year-old son’s scooter Sunday after the Bluegrass festival in River Run. He was playing in the park and strolled down by the river for about five minutes and when he returned his scooter was missing. Extremely upset, as this scooter is his lifeline to summer fun, we called Keystone security. They said they couldn’t help us to locate his stolen scooter and that we would have to fill out a report in the morning. When we returned the following day to file the report, we found out that Keystone Security doesn’t respond to any reports of stolen property under $200. Boo-hiss-and a kiss my you-know-what to Keystone security.”

We told Jake’s mom to see if the Sheriff’s Office could help find the scooter, so maybe that will help. Until then, may the ride-stealing-Crisco-for-brains get laughed to death for riding a little boy’s scooter.

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We’re out S

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