Wishing you a merry, uhhh, holiday, ummm, Christmas
December 15, 2005
Merry Christmas everyone. Or should I have written, Happy Holidays. Or maybe I should have just jotted down, Season’s Greetings.I’m so confused. And living in a country where so many people have enough free time on their hands that they can tighten other parts of their body to the puckering point, it appears that my holiday greeting causes more than a tiny amount of strife.I just watched a whole segment on the nightly news that covered the holiday greeting controversy – yes, there is a big controversy – and I’m appalled. Now normally, if I wish someone a Merry Christmas and they say they are offended by my truly well-intentioned remark, well then I just inform them that there are plenty of greetings I could have used that would really have offended them.
(And I’m sure you, the reader, can think some in this category as well.)I believe that when people say “Merry Christmas” all they are doing is wishing others happiness, joy and maybe a little peace in this sometimes sad, tired and violent world.And the people that take offense have too much damn time on their hands.Sure there are other religions in the world. Yes there are other beliefs or lack of beliefs, but that’s no reason to get all bent out of shape when someone wishes you a Merry Christmas.If I say Merry Christmas and you want to answer, Happy Hanukah, be my guest. If you want to say Happy Kwanza or even, “The peace of our savior Jesus Christ be with you,” I don’t care. If you reply, “Take it cool man,” I think that’s perfect. It’s a greeting that means goodwill no matter how it is said and to take any of these greetings and get upset is moronic.
It is America after all and I could just as freely walk down the street telling everyone to kiss my nose and there isn’t a darn thing anyone could do about it. So if you don’t want my goodwill greeting your only solution is to stay at home, lock your doors and don’t talk to anyone.Besides, I believe it’s a good thing if someone wishes me Happy Hanukah or Kwanza as a reply to my Merry Christmas. No, I’m not Jewish or African American but it’s nice to be included in the celebration of both these holidays, and anyone wishing me joy and happiness by making my family apart of theirs with this type of hello makes my day. It brings us together and the world is better off.When I was a kid people were willing to call out a holiday greeting. But with all the political correctness and idiots taking over our cultures, you just don’t hear it much anymore. People are so afraid to offend anyone that they don’t say anything, and that’s a shame.
It’s time to stop being afraid. It’s a wonderful thing to discover different cultures and the celebrations that bring them together. So if I wish you a Merry Christmas and you want to say, “Hope the fat man drops you some phat stuff” in return, you know I’ll take it in the manner it’s intended. Maybe it’s time we started working on ways to bring us together instead of wasting time on catering to fools.Andrew Gmerek writes a Friday column. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.