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The Breakdown: One shining moment

Bryce Evans
summit daily news
Sports editor Bryce Evans
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Clank. Clank. Clank. Clank. I can’t get that sound out of my head. And I’ve tried, I’ve really tried. I even listened to my wife nag me about taking the garbage out just to hear something else. It didn’t work; nothing’s worked.

Still, it’s got to be worse for Butler’s players, right? I mean, 18 percent shooting in the national title game – the most important game of the season, the game you’ve busted your butt for six months to make it to? Yikes. Normally, when you see numbers like 3-31 (Butler’s shooting on 2-pointers), the only thing that comes to mind is Vince Young taking the Wonderlic. Now, you think of Butler’s sad, little droopy jowled bulldog weeping his way out of Houston.

Needless to say, it wasn’t the best ending to an otherwise great NCAA basketball tournament.

(Note: Although, I have to say, I’ll listen to rims being blasted by bricks on repeat for seven days before I’d want to endure the 3-minute sap-fest that is “One Shining Moment.” I know, it’s as sacrilegious as saying you’re tired of hearing “God Bless America” during every seventh-inning stretch, but, still, we can’t come up with a better closing montage to the tourney than that?)

I guess it’s not all that uncommon for hyped-up games, events or tourneys to end with a thud rather than go out with a bang. It happens pretty often. In fact, there were quite a few instances just this week that will make Butler feel a bit better about its paltry performance …

Time to cele-break. You know how swimming pools always have signs for “No Diving” in the shallow sections? Well, there’s a good reason for that: If you dive in there, you’re likely getting pretty hurt. Anyway, they need to put up a sign next to the 18th green at the Kraft Nabisco Championship – the first major of the year for the LPGA, and a tourney often celebrated by a leap into the water hazard. On Sunday, after Stacy Lewis snagged the trophy, her family joined her for a little dip. The water was a little shallow, and Lewis’ mother fractured her fibula. The tournaments 13 TV viewers were horrified.

The Big … Calf Pull? After shipping center Kendrick Perkins to Oklahoma City at the NBA trade deadline a month ago, the Boston Celtics have been banking on Shaquille O’Neal – the man with more nicknames than titles – to carry the load in the paint. Only problem was that he missed 20-plus games over the last three months. Finally, on Sunday, the Celtics got him back on the court – for 5 minutes. He pulled his calf and had to be helped off the court (by a comically small trainer, no less). Some people are worried, but I think the Big Cactus – or is it Shamrock, or Diesel, or Aristotle? – was just showing that he understands how to play true “Celtic Basketball.” I mean, don’t all their starters have to be carted off in a wheelchair at least once each season?

Junior jobbed at finish. The deep South nearly erupted in jubilation on Sunday when Dale Earnhardt Jr. nearly got his first win since 2008. With the race winding down Junior suddenly … wait, am I really talking about NASCAR? Sorry, let’s just pretend this didn’t happen.

And there was much rejoicing. Tuesday, something amazing happened: A once wayward box came to the offices of the Summit Daily and … wait for it … my Cubs hat was in it! Yes, that very same lid that’s astonishing journey was documented here in “The Breakdown” on three separate occasions finally arrived thanks to one upstanding Breckenridge citizen. First, I’d like to thank Susan for her courage in the face of a hatless, er, hapless situation. Secondly, I need to go to the post office … and send the hat back.

It doesn’t fit. Clank.

Sports editor Bryce Evans once shot roughly 14.3 percent in a pick-up game against his wife. At least that one was over a lot quicker than Butler-UConn was.


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